Mommy servant

You really should look into getting one of these. No, not the massager from Bath and Body Works that Mommy bought in 1999. What you need is a Mommy Servant who will give you a massage on command at bed time. But just make sure you get an attentive Mommy Servant with endurance, who doesn’t quit after 5 seconds because her “hand hurts.” Buck up lady, you can run a marathon but you can’t massage a kid for a minute? Weak!

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